Especially considering how much of a worrier I am.
This morning I was telling my dad about my recent interest in spirituality, my questions and thoughts, and how it on some level relates to Sean being Christian. I mentioned that I know Sean would like me to explore that a little more, and my dad’s response was something to the effect of “you two are drifting apart already, you know that right?”
And that has been on my mind all day.
I don’t think we’re drifting apart. So we don’t have that one thing in common – we’re both open-minded individuals, I think we could handle that difference. That aside, it’s not like it’s a major difference – Sean, while being Christian, has never been so spiritual I couldn’t connect with him, and my current lack of spirituality has never been a problem for him.
But when I told my dad I didn’t think it was a big deal, it was just one difference, you don’t have to have everything in common to be in a relationship, he said “I know you don’t, but your mom and I have a lot of big differences and look where we are.”
That just made it worse.
And now I’m all worried and scared and insecure and I’ve never EVER felt insecure in my relationship with Sean. I love Sean. And he loves me. What’s there to be insecure about.
And I should really be telling him all this but he’s gaming and I don’t want to bother him, so instead I’m putting it here and I’m going to let him know it’s here for when he’s not busy any more.
That and I’ve kind of touched on my worries a little today and I don’t think he’s really noticed. I mentioned earlier that I’m not going to push too hard at this whole religion thing right now, because I feel like right now I’m doing a lot of it for him and I don’t think your faith should come from anyone but yourself. That’s awful wording, I really hope you know what I mean though. And he didn’t really say anything. And I mentioned that we were both open minded individuals and I didn’t think it was a problem, and said something else after that, and he didn’t really comment on the first part, just the something else that didn’t matter as much.
I haven’t been very direct though. I didn’t realize quite what was going on in my head until just a little bit ago.
And now I’m word vomiting all over my blog.
I think that’s everything. I’m just worrying today.
Could someone please hold me and pet my head and tell me everything is okay and my worries are all for naught?
Peace, Love, and Reassurance,