How Can You Have So Much Hate In Your Heart? Wake Up, The World Is Beautiful

So, last night was pretty ridiculous. I was so tired and overwhelmed and sad yesterday – I kept having little crying jags. So when I was finally home and able to settle down for the night, all I wanted to do was relax, talk to Sean, and then get some sleep. A lot of sleep.

 

As a part of this, I got on facebook. I thought I’d check my friends stuff, post a status, maybe play some Words with Friends – y’know, that sort of thing.

But then there was drama, literally, everywhere.

 

Haley had posted a status about she and her boyfriend watching Netflix together from different locations – similar to what Sean and I do. I made a joke about how “Sean and I originated the Netflix date. You’re welcome ^.~” – mind you, I’m sure someone else started it. It was a JOKE.

Elizabeth, some girl Haley knows, comments back, cussing up a storm and just being mean. At the same time, I see this image on Haley’s feed:

Being the Gatsby lover than I am, I comment about how great it is, followed up with something along the lines of “wait, isn’t Myrtle supposed to be a little chubby?”

You can see where Elizabeth clearly misunderstood me, thinking I have a problem with Myrtle’s size as it should be – chubby. From there it just got worse. On that other post she started getting nasty as well, mainly to Sean (who also commented).

In an attempt to clear things up, worried I had unknowingly wronged her, I sent her a private message.

“Hey, is there a reason you’re attacking me and Sean?”

I was hoping this message would start a calm, reasonable conversation. I felt we had miscommunicated somewhere, I just didn’t know where.

Her response:

“You call that attacking? Somebody’s hypersensitive.
You don’t know me. You must not have picked up the sarcasm. Then you got your boyfriend all posting on the same status like a big diva. You’re closer to attacking me than I’m attacking you.”

It just downward spiraled from there. She was mean, nasty, and super judgmental. I told her her hostility confused me, and that other people took it as hostility as well – not the sarcasm she claims it was. And she just kept telling me they were HER words and I took them the wrong way and that’s MY problem.

She argued a lot like my little brother.

After a lot of crap, she said this:

Haha. You think you’re such a good person too.

You probably suck. You probably backstab your friends and spread your legs across the wide state of Michigan (you can reach). You probably chew with your mouth open and cry every time somebody isn’t talking about you. You probably want to wear purple at your wedding (That’s not a bad idea). You’ll probably get left at the alter when your fiancé decides he’d rather sail across the world than be tied down. You probably will just roll your eyes and forget this because I’m a nobody. (Like I’m going to do with you.) You will probably recall this and feel better about yourself and at least you have your Netflix dates with your boyfriend who doesn’t understand sarcasm either. You’re going to think you were such a good person for staying up all night trying to type words at me that, let’s face it, I haven’t really been reading.

And you’re probably going to infer more about me.

Things just got…nasty. In the end, a few messages later, I blocked her.

But, y’know, I can’t help but wonder how we got to this point. How can someone have so much hatred to take out on a random stranger? How can someone be so angry just like that, with no rhyme or reason?

It’s just…sad. It makes me sad to think that we can live in such a beautiful place, but that somebody could be so angry, with no apparent reason.

Even sadder, I kept thinking of that line, “be kind to people. every one you meet is fighting their own battle” or something like that. And that really hit me last night – because, maybe she was going through something. And I know I was going through something. The last thing I needed last night was someone to attack me like that, to say the mean things she said to me. But, if she was going through something, then there was no room for the mean things I said either, no matter how warranted they felt.

I’m still a bit hurt though. I’m hurt that I try so hard to be nice to everyone, to the point that when I complete stranger seems upset with me I confront it, because even though I hardly know this stranger, perhaps I have offended them in some way – that I try so hard but then get kicked down. I was very much reminded of the Cain sisters last night. I tried to reach out and be kind to them to, at one point or another.

It’s something I don’t think I’ll ever understand.

Peace, love, and kindness,

Jax

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One thought on “How Can You Have So Much Hate In Your Heart? Wake Up, The World Is Beautiful

  1. wait what WHY ARE PEOPLE SO MEAN 😦

    “be kinder than necessary, for everyone is fighting some kind of battle”

    that girl is a meanie and its good that you blocked her

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